This outfit wins our first-ever “Chronic Award.” We showed this ad about year ago, on Sept. 5, 2021. We’re not so smug as to presume everyone reads our column. And we don’t contact offenders. That would shift us from observers to activists. But you’d think after a year, someone would have let these people know. Or that, if they knew, they’d fix it. Nope. As of today, the ad still ran exactly this way. In case you forgot, the ad literally says, “ten million dollars dollars.”
Clarity, clarity, clarity! Who supported Trump’s impeachment? Murkowski or her challenger? If you follow the news, you know it was Murkowski. But not everyone does. If the reader has to go look it up, the news outlet has failed. (And, by the way, Murkowski didn’t just support Trump’s impeachment, she supported his conviction. By now, most of us should know the difference. Clarity!)
Remember “Mother may I?” That’s what “may” means. It means you have permission. People often confuse it with “can,” which means “able to.” You “can” reach for a cookie, but it’s up to mother whether you “may” have one. In this case, “may” is used to mean “might,” but that’s wrong. If you feel “might” suggests a small probability, don’t say “could,” because he certainly is able to do it. Say, “judge considers unsealing…”
Baruch Kahana
Umm, she already was missing before she vanished?
Eliot always has had a problem with “nuclear test.” A euphemism is “a mild or indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing.” That’s what this is. You technically might be testing the thing. But it seems “test” minimizes the news that someone on this planet EXPLODED A NUCLEAR BOMB! We believe in clarity and impact. But since this is a judgment call, we throw it out to our readers. Discuss!
And we go to the video archives for Segment 24: Bad history. https://youtu.be/HzAwRcjI53w
Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong" features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police.” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, menus, TV news graphics, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we properly can credit you. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com
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NOTE: Eliot and Lou Ann are available for speaking engagements, and can travel. Reach us through the comments section. Just think of all of your employees getting back to work on a Monday, their heads filled with all the ways we’ve shown them to be better communicators!