Old Lang’s Sign
https://temporaryservices.org/
Grammatic diarrhea
People bend backward metaphorically, but in real life, they bend just one way. Down.
“Accuse” and allege are the same thing.
Queue and line are the same thing. Just say, “stood in long lines…”
If someone’s been charged with murder, the shooting already was deadly. (PS: We don’t like “deadly.” It means “capable of causing death.” Clearly, in this case, it already happened.)
Great news! It’s open. Better yet, it’s open! How about: “…will be open normal hours on Memorial Day, May 27.” We got 29 words down to 13.
Yes, every day people wander the halls until they locate the permit or the ice machines or the exit. The word is redundant. Bonuses: Personal safety is redundant. Isn’t it? And then there’s the maligned comma. Machines are on floors 10, 15, and 18, and in the lobby. And lose all the upper case!
All you need: “Credit card purchases require physical card and photo ID.” Nine words.
We say retailers, just like everyone else, should write tight. Some might argue some shoppers are slow and need to be hit over the head. Readers?
And we go to the video archives for Segment 79: More Hiding in Plain Sight: https://youtu.be/ZZwXrZqo50I?si=LmQF2eaM-JcqvWwL
Items before the Assizes:
Oyez, Oyez, Oyez! On the docket:
Eliot requested the Rules Committee (Lou Ann) check our “style” bible, the Associated Press Stylebook, and opine on the following:
ELIOT: I argue the phrase '“3D printing" is wrong. "Printing" is about ink on paper. What these machines are doing is manufacturing solid objects. What sayeth the Rules Committee?
RULES COMMITTEE: “Brave new language world. 3D printing is preferred over the technically more accurate ‘additive manufacturing.’”
Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong" features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police.” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, menus, TV news graphics, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we can credit you properly. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com
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NOTE: Eliot and Lou Ann are available for speaking engagements, and can travel. Reach us through the comments section. Just think of all of your employees getting back to work on a Monday, their heads filled with all the ways we’ve shown them to be better communicators!