We talked in April 2022, and again in July 2023, about William Strunk, creator of the bible of good writing, Elements of Style. His prime directive: “Avoid Unnecessary Words.” To wit:

1. “He made his final decision.”
   ”He decided.” Yes, people sometimes make preliminary decisions. But a decision is presumed to be the final one— often, the only one — unless you specify.

2. “A completely new edition.”
   ”A new edition.” Something “new” is considered all new unless you specify. Some people sometimes say “completely new” when they mean just some parts are new.

3. “Publicly released the documents!”
   ”Released the documents.” Some documents can be released privately, but a release is presumed to be to the public unless you specify. Also, we don’t like “released.”

4. “The coaches huddled in between plays.”
   ”The coaches huddled between plays.”

5. Preheat the oven.
   Heat the oven.

6. “U.S. temporarily suspends operations at embassy in Sudan.”
   We've dealt with “suspend” a few times, starting as far back as December 2022. It implies something temporary. So even as "permanently suspends" is an oxymoron, "temporarily suspends" is redundant.

7. “An act of vandalism temporarily ruined a rainbow fence.”
   Again. By definition, “ruin” would be permanent. The fence was temporarily defaced. Actually, just say it was defaced.

8. “Personal and confidential.”
   You likely have seen this on the front of an envelope. We’ll allow as how the two aren’t exactly the same. But for purposes of that mailing, “confidential” on the envelope is enough.

9. “Deadly gang shootout leaves three dead at motorcycle rally.”
   If it left three dead, it’s already deadly, right?

10. “Please gather your personal belongings as you leave the aircraft.”
    We’ve beaten up flight attendants over the redundant “landing momentarily” and “initial descent.” This too. All belongings are personal. Just say, “belongings.”

11. “American Airlines plane turns back around to airport mid-flight.” (Submitted by Dr. Baruch Kahana)
“…plane turns back to airport…”

12. “Customer notice: Prices are for cash purchases. Credit/debit card purchases will be charged an additional 3.5% to offset processing fees.”
“Credit/debit: Add 3.5%.”

13. “What to watch for when are you are hiring new employees.”
”We’re not hiring new employees. We’re hiring old employees.” Sounds pretty dumb, wouldn’t you say? All newly hired employees at your company are new employees. So just say, “…when you are hiring employees.” Actually, it’s just , “…when you are hiring.”

14. With your help, we can do more for the Cincinnati community.”
”With your help, we can do more for Cincinnati.”

Next time: We learn the origins of some brutal clichés.

Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong," features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police.” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we can credit you properly. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com

Haven’t signed up for our newsletter yet? Do it now! And tell your friends!